Break-ups suck. Like really suck. The crying, the pain, the feelings of hurt. But sometimes, there are people who are able to get a little revenge. It might not make their pain go away, but boy I bet it feels good at the time. These Redditors tell their stories of the time they got revenge on a deserving ex-partner. Content has been edited for clarity.
The Sweetest Revenge
“I dated a girl who I really liked, but she was always hot and cold to me. When she was cold, she could really treat me like a bucket of trash. It took me way longer than it should have, but I finally manned up and dumped her. She proceeded to alternately try to win me back and seduce my friends; basically, an immature reaction from an immature person.
A couple of weeks later, I meet an amazing girl at a concert and we start dating. This new girl is awesome, cool, fun and attractive, but within a week of dating her, I realize something else about her. My awful ex had had a job the summer before, which had her basically spending the whole summer with a girl that she had developed a major complex about. Wherever the two went anywhere together, guys would always hit on this other girl and never hit on my ex. It got to the point, that my ex had developed this major anxiety-complex regarding this girl she worked with. By pure random chance, I had gone out and met that girl and was now dating her.
The satisfaction I felt when I showed up at a party around a month after the breakup and letting the ex see who I was with was immense. She had a total melt down that included crying, screaming, and ranting. Then she screamed at the guy she came with, ‘Take me home right now, we’re leaving!’
To which he replied, ‘Call a cab psycho, I’m not taking you anywhere.’
It’s the little moments in life that you have to cherish.”
That’s Pretty Inventive
“My then-high-school-girlfriend was a total demon. She wanted me to abandon all of my friends and would always try to bring me down.
When I got fed up, I broke up with her on picture day. She took them, but her mascara was everywhere. Two days later, I told her that I was sorry, blahblah, and I wanted to get back together. She liked having someone to walk on, so of course she said yes.
I then broke up with her again on retake day. Nailed it.”
Not Cool, Man
“I had a girlfriend back when I was younger. I found out she cheated on me after we had been dating for almost two years. I had worked with her brother and been to her parents house several times while we were dating and I became close to them. Once I found out that she had been cheating and didn’t have any intentions of stopping, I mailed (that’s right, mailed) pictures of her unclothed and blowing me to her parents and brother.
She came to my apartment severely annoyed and started screaming at me at the top of her lungs. I snatched her purse out of her hands and threw it out the window onto the middle of a busy street. She did not come back upstairs to continue her rant.”
I Don’t Want To Know
“My ex-girlfriend was studying to become a vet when I found out she was cheating on me. I cannot completely divulge the things she did because of their illegal nature, but it involved animals. You’re free to make your own assumptions.
So, I changed the locks, she came home, couple days later she’d cleared out all her stuff. Police were involved, but I was judged totally fairly, surprisingly.
As punishment for the medical tests I had to undergo to make sure I was unaffected by her terrible decisions, I mailed the evidence I’d found to her mother, who said nothing. I mailed it to her veterinary school, who apparently became so disgusted they refunded every cent of her tuition and removed her from the program. I mailed the evidence to the vet she was interning with, who banned her from ever coming back under any circumstances unless she was in possession of an animal with a life-threatening condition. Finally, I returned the cats she was fostering at my house to the shelter they’d come from, and explained why I was terminating the foster program early. The lady at the shelter went ghost-white and left to ‘go make several phone calls.’
This isn’t really revenge so much as it is karma, but when I changed the locks, I sat her down and reverse image looked up the pictures she was sending to random guys on the internet. They’d made it to over twenty different fetish sites in under 48 hours. She was horrified.”
She Left Him Outside?
“My girlfriend and I moved to her hometown with my then 2-year old son. We were staying with her parents while we saved up to get a place. Well, the week before Christmas she decided she didn’t want to be with me anymore and called me at work saying, ‘Come get your son, I’ve already packed your stuff.’
I arrived there to find my son in his PJ’s on the porch with no coat standing next to our things while she was inside with her family and new boyfriend. I had never hit a woman, but man if I didn’t want to then. But, I digress.
Anyways, we took a bus back home and stayed with my parents. As I was unpacking my stuff, I found a customized T-shirt of hers that she mistakenly packed with my stuff. It was a screened T-shirt with a picture of her little sister who had passed away at 8 years old the previous year, and it was the last Christmas present she had gotten from her. When I saw it, I took my laptop outside, set it on a stool in front of the burn barrel in the back yard, and proceeded to Skype call my ex.
She answered with ‘Before you say anything, I am so sorry for wh…HEY HOW DID YOU GET THAT!’ as I started to douse lighter fluid on the shirt, and then proceeded to light that thing and throw it in the burn barrel before her horrified eyes.”
Some Truly Amazing Revenge
“Actually my brother’s revenge, but still pretty good (in a bittersweet kind of way).
So he was going out with this girl for 6 years (ages 18-24 ish). It was the first serious relationship either one had ever been in, and they were inseparable for those 6 years. She was over our house literally every day. Over those years, our families actually got very close, and her parents (great people) got really close to my brother, to the point where they were already pretty much considering him their son-in-law.
Around the same time my brother was getting out of college and getting a job, he started looking for rings since he was now financially stable enough to pop the question. Then he found out (still don’t know how, he never talks about it) that she had cheated on him with multiple guys on multiple occasions.
Needless to say, he broke up with her immediately. Over the next few weeks, she called him constantly and came over a few times, begging for forgiveness because she genuinely still wanted to be with him. So, one day my brother went to her house (she lives with her parents), knocked on the door, and told her to let him in because he wanted to talk.
He went in, but instead of talking to her, called her parents and sister downstairs, sat down at the table, and MADE HER TELL THEM ALL IN DETAIL what she did.
It must’ve been incredibly hard for him, but what a way to get back.”
A Spanking
“This happened a while ago. A bit of background: my then-girlfriend had relations with this ex marine guy who was a total hothead the first day we went on a break. He got kicked out because he punched his CO in the face. Real smart of her to get involved in, but what am I going to do. I had to deal with him all the time, calling her, freaking her out, showing up at her house at 3:00 am and sitting for a few hours then leaving. The kid was nuts. What made it bad for me was that he was 24. I was 17 at the time. I’m pretty strong for my age, but I’m not going to lie to myself. There was nothing I could do against someone of his physique. He was my height and outweighed me by probably 40 pounds.
Halloween of last year, he showed up when my girlfriend and I were having a fight, about him funnily enough. He rolled into the parking lot, no idea how he found us, but whatever. He got out of his car and stormed towards us. She walked over to him and told him to leave. I yell at him to get out, and roll up my sleeves ready for a rumble, and he saw this as a threat.
He puffs up and yells ‘Come the at me you peasant!’
I thought for a second. I had had enough of this guy. It had been a year, he had been tormenting her and I. So I walked over toward him, and he started getting all ready for some real Hulk smash stuff to go down. I walked right past him, over to his car, opened up the driver door, and asked him to get in. He looked at me like I just asked him nicely to do something, and overcome with neanderthal rage, he ran full speed at me. I was terrified, and at the last second, moved out of the way, pushing the door closed. He smashed face-first into the window and did a number on the side of the car. His face was really messed up, and I didn’t know whether he was conscious.
I never got into a physical altercation before, so I was really disturbed by this and didn’t know how to act. I looked at him, and did the first thing that came into my head. I spanked him over and over and said, ‘leave me alone,’ spanking him on each word. My girlfriend stopped me and I stood up.
I looked at her and said ‘you want to have his children (they had done it unprotected), then you deal with his childish antics. I’m done with both of you’
I got in my car, and drove the speed limit out of there, freed of all of my baggage, and heart beating like a drum.”
International Revenge
“Now, when I met my ex, he was ideal. He was what I thought I needed. I believed I loved him and that the fairy tale was real. We met by random chance, both many hours from our homes – me whilst running away from a situation at home, he while a planned trip abroad.
I ended up in Europe within a month and we married about 10 months later. All good, right? Well… it was. Until I started racking up university degrees with honors, and he began to realize that not only was I significantly younger (about 17 years), thinner (a big issue in his mind, not in my mind at all), and (according to him) better looking – I was now better educated. He was always a bit insecure, but the degrees seemed to really push him over the edge.
While I was waiting for my spousal visa, things were falling apart. We both kind of gave up, but decided to resolve to save our relationship. I moved and found that nothing he had promised to prepare had happened. The home situation was a mess. We were living with his quite elderly widower father and he was meant to be taking care of him and the household. None of this was happening. Instead, both my ex and his disgusting sister were essentially living as leeches off of their 80-something father.
I tried to make things work. But within a week and a half of me landing, he threw an iPad at my head and punched the wall next to my head whilst screaming that he could have me deported at will. Okay. Well, fine. I made a promise. I kept trying. It got worse. I took months of emotional abuse, insults, threats, cursing, and everything else short of him actually laying hands on me.
Six months later, he randomly disappeared for two weeks to visit Seattle without mentioning it to me. I left. I started over with nothing much to my name but a job and a bit of money thousands of kilometers from anyone I knew. He expected me to run home. I didn’t falter. I blossomed.
About a year later, I met my present partner who has been the truest and most loyal partner I could’ve wished for. Truly, if I had to do it all again I would if I knew my partner would be on the other side.
Now, for my revenge.
I happened to find out that he had a new girlfriend that seemed very serious and noticed she had mentioned wedding planning on social media. You have to keep tabs on your abusers, especially when your safety is at risk. Now, she’s welcome to him – the only issue is, due to Draconian divorce laws in my current country, we were not divorced yet. He planned on marrying her in another country.
When we met, he told me he had never been married. I later found out he was indeed divorced. I was willing to bet he fed her the same exact lie.
So, I sent her a message. My suspicions were confirmed. He told her he had NEVER been married. I was wife number two. She didn’t want to believe it until I sent her a photo of our marriage license as well as a few wedding photos.
I did feel really badly about doing that to her because I could tell how hurt she was, but I knew it was better for her to know the truth than to inadvertently marry him the next month in Seattle as they had planned. She had children. She had a violent ex-husband. She and I actually ended the conversation on a positive note with her thanking me and me apologizing and explaining why I felt I had to tell her.
And then, the fallout.
My phone started blowing up. Unknown number. In the evening. Hmmm, wonder who that might be?
I was out enjoying a lovely dinner with my partner and answered a call on speaker. In came the usual threats to my person and security, blah blah blah. I could only laugh. He didn’t know where I was, nor was he getting past my partner. I could finally relax knowing I was safe after months of night terrors.
And then…
‘I HAVE LOST THE LOVE OF MY LIFE BECAUSE OF YOU! SHE HAS LEFT ME AND THROWN ALL OF MY THINGS OUT OF HER HOME!’
People, I lost it. I could. Not. Stop. Laughing. It was poetic.
He sent a similar email to my mother laced with blatant lies about me (as if she didn’t know the play by play as it was happening and as if she’d believe a word he had to say anyway).
After I got done laughing, I hung up on him and had my number changed.
Then, I remembered his sister was living at the same home.
His sister has a disabled daughter that lives 200 km away that she claims benefits for, including an apartment and money allowances. She then sublets the handicap accessible apartment to her boyfriend illegally whilst leeching off of her father.
Now, if the sister got reported to the council for fraud, and they did minimal investigation, they’d see she was falsely claiming benefits for an adult daughter who lived far away and had her own benefits (deserved) from another council. She would lose her apartment and possibly face jail time. If she lost her apartment, it was certain she would NEVER leave the father’s home. It was my ex’s worst nightmare. He loathed his sister.
So, I made it happen.
Besides, how dare she claim money she isn’t entitled to simply due to her being too lazy to work? She was a neglectful mother when she was actually caring for her kid (leaving her kid in a wheelchair with a jam sandwich and running to the pub the moment benefit money came in), now she was lying and keeping a rare accessible apartment from someone who truly needs it.
That more than justified it.
But the thought of both of them being stuck in the same house, fighting all day and night, both too lazy to leave and too stubborn to give up the inheritance they fantasize about? That’s a lovely thought to me.
What makes it better? Knowing he cried his eyes out over his lost fiancée in that very same house, soaking in his miserable existence.
Sweetest revenge ever.”
Very Inventive
“I was in a relationship for two years – two years too long. He was an abusive drinker that was lovingly manipulative when sober. I broke up with him after having to call the police on him after a rather rough night. Two weeks later and I’m staying strong, telling him he has to be sober for at least a year before I would ever consider giving him another chance. For the first time I stuck to my no, which was new for him, and he very much so did not like it. Cue him then spilling that he had been cheating on me for two months anyways with a girl he had sworn he was just friends with.
Two months later, I’m going through a junk drawer of mine and I found I still had his spare car key. I am not an angry person day to day and I honestly don’t even wish anything bad towards him. I did however move his car two blocks every morning for a week. And on the last day, after what I’m sure was a week of being late to work and feeling on the verge of insanity, I left his car where he had parked it. I did also though turn the volume to max and move everything movable slightly. Do I think it was healthy? Not really, but it did feel great.”
Expensive And Awesome Revenge
“My ex was super into the drift scene and loved cool cars, but he was always super broke. He broke up with me on Christmas Day by gifting me a pair of socks and telling me it wasn’t working out after I had bought him a ton of nice Christmas gifts. The next week, I took all my hard-earned money I was saving up to by myself a new car and bought the exact one he talked about constantly, but was too broke to buy himself.
I made sure he saw it by driving through the parking garage he was working at as the ticket guy and it felt really good to see his face as he handed me that ticket.”
That’s A Lot Of Stuff
“My girlfriend cheated on me when I was 22. My best friend took all of her cosmetics out of my bathroom, threw them into an empty garbage can and lit it all on fire. When she showed up to pick up her stuff he just pointed at the smoking container. Then she left.
Probably several hundred dollars worth of stuff. She was really angry.”
Like His Dad
“He always spoke about how he hated his dad for cheating and lying to his mom, so when I find out he cheated on me with multiple women I went to his apartment and found a photo of us on his bedside table and wrote ‘just like your daddy’ on it.
I also took all his toilet paper and hand soap because even though he was the 25-year-old man with a job and I was a 19-year-old college student, he apparently couldn’t buy his own things and I had to buy it for him. So, technically it was mine.”
Served Her Right
“In 2009, I deployed for a 6-month tour to the Helmend Province in Afghanistan. A month into the deployment, I was just getting 6 months into my first ‘real’ relationship. It was long distance, as I was stationed in NC, and she lived back home in NY. We were planning on getting married, but my Staff Sergeant gave me a little speech and I decided that it was best to wait until after the deployment.
She was already cheating on me four months into the relationship. I took it hard. And that’s all I thought about for 6 months while I waited to get back home. I had a bunch of her stuff and she had some of mine. I never got any of my stuff back, but she had given me this tiny little dancer trinket to wear on my dog tags. Her mother had given it to her before she ran off, so it had some sentimental value to her.
Oh, and 5 months into my deployment, her new Level 3 offender boyfriend who she left me for, goes back to prison for probation violation. I get a message over Facebook that she ‘just found out she’s six months pregnant, and it’s mine.’
There’s no way you ‘just find out you’re 6 months pregnant’ when you weigh 110 pounds soaking wet. It was a sham to get me back– there was no pregnancy.
6 months later, I arrive back home. I go into the Subway where she works, and lo-and-behold she’s working. I walk in, and she goes ‘Welcome to Su…’ and cuts off mid-sentence as she sees me, with a look of absolute horror on her face. I walk in, walk up to the counter, look her dead in the eyes, set the dancer trinket on the counter, shake my head, and turn around and walk out. I could hear her start crying before I got to the door.
I’m much more successful out of the military. I have a great job, an amazing girlfriend, and a sweet town home. I’m about to get a dog here soon. I’ve never blocked her on Facebook. I just don’t see her updates in my news feed. She’ll poke me every once in a while, but I never poke back. It’s nice to know that she can watch me be successful without her and I know her life is in shambles.
About once a year she tries to message me and ask me how I’m doing, but it usually ends with her going on some depressing rant about how she messed up and wishes she never cheated on me and left me.”
Hello? Burn Center?
“I found out a guy I’d dated for almost a year (and who wanted me to move in with him and wanted to get me pregnant?!) had been cheating with his ex nearly the whole relationship. He was very insecure about his little member’s size (emphasis on little).
So after I confronted him about the cheating, and he was begging forgiveness, I texted, ‘Oh don’t stress about it. Just means you’ve been disappointing two women in bed for the last year instead of just one.’
Super petty, but quite effective as an immediate show-stopper.”