Weddings are a beautiful occasion. It's when two people who love each other commit to spending the rest of their lives together in a perfect ceremony. Although, it does not mean the day is going to be perfect. Sometimes, accidents happen. When they do, it's sometimes not the best idea to tell the bride. After all, she has enough to worry about on her big day.
Wedding planners on Reddit share the thing that went wrong they kept from the bride on her wedding day. Content has been edited for clarity.
“She Lost It Laughing”
“At my wedding, my maid of honor was responsible for holding my husband’s wedding ring until we exchanged them in the ceremony, and the best man was holding mine. I was super distracted goofing around with my dad getting ready to walk up the aisle. I didn’t think to double check with with my maid of honor before we got the show on the road.
During the ceremony, I’m definitely paying all my attention on my husband and my grandfather (who was officiating the ceremony), and not on my maid of honor or bridesmaids. I didn’t even notice when my husband’s aunt popped up behind me and slipped the ring to my maid of honor. She played it off really well, and I had no clue she’d forgotten the ring in the room we used to get dressed and ready.
Nobody said a word, and would have gotten away with me never knowing had my aunt not been recording the ceremony for me! I noticed about a week later when my aunt posted the video to Facebook that his aunt popped up on the pulpit with everyone. I asked my sister (a bridesmaid) what happened, and she lost it laughing.
My poor maid of honor felt horrible she’d forgotten about the ring, but my husband’s aunt saved the day when my sister and maid of honor managed to wordlessly communicate what had happened and she found the ring and got it to us in like 20 seconds.”
“Nice One, Planner”
“I was the bride. My wedding planner dropped the top two tiers of my cake, and didn’t say anything to me then had the catering department fix it by putting flowers all over the first tier to hide what happened. My Sister-In-Law thought I knew because after they dropped it, one of them came upstairs where I was getting ready and when they went back down she said.
‘It’s ok, we have to try to fix it,’ she said.
No one ever came to me. The only reason I knew is after the wedding, she told me they did a nice job of fixing it even though she didn’t think it could be fixed. I knew there was something different with the cake, but it looked nice so I was okay with that. After hearing it, I was heated but all in all, I couldn’t even tell. Nice one, planner.”
“Nobody Knew Or Saw It”
“The wedding planner for one of my good friend’s wedding went above and beyond.
Friend’s mother was a horrid woman. Very self centered. Narcissistic. The way you feel about Umbridge the first minute into the fifth Harry Potter movie. You feel that way in two seconds meeting her.
She was banned by friend and uninvited a week before the big day. The final straw being her mother was going to wear a wedding dress (not a white dress which is bad enough. No. Actual wedding gown). To her daughter’s wedding.
It was an awful week. We were doing everything we could all do to help friend and her soon to be husband relax, enjoy and get that witch out of their heads.
Day of wedding. It’s beautiful. In a beautiful church. Everything is fantastic. The wedding planner, he was like some magical fairy godfather. Just guiding and leading and managing one transition into another flawlessly. If there were hiccups, nobody knew or saw it. He even had set up professional child care in the church’s children room for those there with young ones. The vows ceremony flowed into the reception room.
Then the horrid beast showed up. Stomping up the hallway, wearing that dress looking like tore up colfax lady of the night.
She didn’t even make it to the reception hall way. The wedding planner jumped her like a secret service agent! I don’t even know where he came out of. One moment, crazy lady, next Wedding Planner silent ninja strike!
Hand over her mouth and dragged her out so fast that us maids and the groomsmen didn’t have time to even gasp.
Bride and groom never found out she got in. They think she was arrested in the church’s lot. (She probably shouldn’t have done what she did having out of state warrants out for her). They didn’t find out even that much till after their month long honeymoon, which was probably due to even the rest of friend’s family wanting nothing to do with her mother.
All of us have continued to recommend him or use his business for own events back in Colorado since then.
He looked crazy in the eyes, took it on like a pro and then went about the rest of the day like a pro Disney Cast member.”
“She Had No Idea”
“When my wife and I got married, we chose a deep winter date. We had a friend make up all the buttonholes and bouquets and picked them up the day before the wedding as we were getting married in another town. My wife’s bouquet was quite large, and was in a bucket of water to keep it fresh. We stayed (in separate rooms obviously) in a small hotel in the town, and I left the flowers in the car to ensure they stayed as fresh as possible.
Unbeknownst to me at the time, that night was going to be the coldest of the year and plummet to about -12C. The following morning, my wife had got up early with her party and already gone to the venue to get ready. I got up and got ready then headed out to the car to drop the necessary flowers off with my father-in-law at the wedding venue before heading to the church.
Got to the car, and the bucket with her bouquet had frozen solid! I headed up to the venue and got her dad out. Like a champion, he took over and got the wedding planner to find every hair dryer in the place to melt the ice so the bouquet could be used. I left him to it and when my wife turned up at the church she looked amazing, and was carrying an ice free, wonderful bouquet. She had no idea there was any problems at all!”
“It Became Obvious Something Wasn’t Right”
“At my step sister’s wedding, her grandfather had a mild stroke right in the middle of the vows. He’s pretty loud and a touch belligerent, but it became much more obvious something wasn’t right as we were having the formal photos done.
With barely a word, the wedding planner booked a taxi for my parents to take him to the hospital nearby to have him checked over quickly. He promised to keep an eye on us kids.
It came to light it was a little more serious than they’d thought, and they wanted him to be admitted to the hospital near where we lived (a four hour drive away).
Queue him phoning about ten car rental places (the Saturday before Christmas no less) to have a car delivered to them at the hospital so they could leave immediately, whilst speaking to the hotel to have their bags packed up. He then delivered them to us ,and waited for us to finish dinner and toast the happy couple before driving us to the train station himself and booking us train tickets back home. He even slipped us a tenner from his own pocket for the taxi to our house at the other end.
The whole time he was keeping up to date with my parents so he could update my step sister from worrying to much. I can only imagine how out her mind with worry she would have been without him telling her he was okay.
Grandpa ended up being just fine, and even jokes it was the only way of getting out of giving a speech.
The whole situation was dealt with with such professionalism and care. He made what could have been a nightmare so much less stressful he went on to plan several other family and friends weddings on the back of that story alone.””
“Tradition Is Tradition”
“The girls in the family have made it tradition to wear my moms wedding dress for their weddings. It’s a beautiful mid-1960s dress with tons of pearls and lace and things, and a crazy long train. It had been in a cedar chest for about 15 years since its last use, and needed to be restored. Due to last minute errors, my niece was to pick it up the morning before the wedding. As a gift to her, I paid for the restoration and the restitching and sizing, whatever it’s all called. She let me go with her to see it sized and fitted and it’s one of my favorite memories, I love that girl so much.
I had concerns about how flippant and lackadaisical the dressmaker had been during the whole evolution. Way too many ‘No problems’ and ‘Of course’ and ‘Don’t worry!’ to make me feel like she knew what she was really doing. She finished two days early, sweet. I called her and paid, then asked her to hang on to it since I wanted it in safe keeping, not in my car or house.
I got there the next day, the day before the wedding and she didn’t have it. She made a mistake and shipped it to St. Louis from Richmond, Virginia two days before. After a few minutes of finding out where it went and calling the recipient, another bride waiting for a dress, I checked my GPS and got on the road. Right then and there, less than 30 hours until the wedding. I called my sister (mother of the bride) and told her what was happening and forbade her from telling my niece. There was a backup wedding dress so it wasn’t a total catastrophe, but tradition is tradition.
Twenty-six straight hours of driving later, the dress was getting unwrapped and my niece was putting it on for the big day. It was perfect and looked amazing on her. Then the group photo of all the other ladies who had worn it was taken. My niece never knew until months after the wedding when the dressmaker called her to apologize for the mix up. Darn that daffy dressmaker for doing that.
My niece is expecting a baby soon and I’m so stoked, I’ll go the extra mile for her too if needed.”
“She Can’t Know”
“The bride pulled me aside during rehearsal to tell me the groom’s brother (also the best man) was planning to find a girl from a dating app as his date. She was less than thrilled about all of this, as apparently he doesn’t have a great track record.
He found someone and my bride was stressing.
We made it through ceremony and drinking hour without incident. Dinner was going great and we’re about to do toasts when I can’t find the brother anywhere. Lo and behold, the girl is gone too. I have the DJ stall a bit, and recruit some people to go find them.
I walk into the bathroom and under a stall I see guys shoes with a girl squatting down between them. Little idiots.
So I pretend to be on the phone and say ‘Yeah we’re about to do toasts, I just have to find the best man then I’ll be right there.;
I heard an ‘Oh no!’ as I walked out and he was in giving his toast five minutes later.
As everyone is out dancing and having a grand old time, one of the resort staff pulls me aside and says there’s a situation. I go talk with them and they’ve also snagged my groom. Come to find out brother and the girl have been removed from the property, because they were found in a less than discrete spot, with his head up her dress going down on her.
Groom looks at me and all he says is, ‘She can’t know.’
So my sweet bride not only didn’t find out that her brother in law was getting head in a bathroom stall five minutes before the speech, but she also doesn’t know he was kicked out for going down on the class act girl he found.
Thank God for great staff and vendors who are flexible!”
“She Was Feeling A Little Sick”
“My wedding was a little rough from the start. We were on a shoestring budget (14k start to finish including all incidentals in an area where 30k is considered a cheap wedding) and things were not always going well. The photographer didn’t commit until a week before the wedding and on the day of, the bus carrying my husband, step daughter, groomsmen and bridesmaids crashed INTO the venue. (No one was hurt and my MOH is a paramedic. More than 1/2 of my guests are nurses, first responders and paramedics. We were covered.)
Just before I’m set to walk down the aisle, my dad says to me ‘Just so you know, your grandma was feeling a little sick so she had to stay home today.’
She was 94. Made total sense to me. One of my cousins was missing from the wedding, but they said she took my grandma to the doctor (Grandma can’t drive, makes sense.).
It wasn’t until two days later when I was in New York City with our out of state and out of country guests that I see a post from my cousin with a picture of the view from Grandma’s hospital room.
She’d had a major heart attack the night before my wedding, had surgery the day of or after (can’t remember which) and all I was told was ‘She was feeling a little sick,’ because no one wanted me sad on my wedding day. My aunts, uncles, cousins were all there to celebrate with me, they all knew (you’re talking almost 40+ people) and they ALL kept it a secret.”
“It Was Still Too Tight”
“My first wedding is an independent planner I took on because the bride had some major problems with her venue. This was a high end hotel in a major city, so having these kind of problems should be unexpected. She knows about some of the things they did wrong but not nearly everything. The wedding turned out okay, so I didn’t need to tell her things that weren’t necessary. She already had enough trouble, and I would have hate for her to be more upset than she already was.
The biggest problem was when she booked the room, she had a new staff member assisting her with the sale. She booked a blackout date which is a big no-no because most of the staff is on vacation. Then, the sales person assumed that reception style set up was appropriate for a wedding. Reception style means most people would be standing and there would only be drink tables and bars. Banquet style is appropriate for weddings, since there are large round tables for everyone to be seated for dinner. So she booked a room that was way too small for all of the guests she had, and there was no staff available on the day. I had them move bars out into the lobby, dessert table into the lobby, I had their head table set up on the dance floor and then broken down for dancing. I rearranged their whole itinerary to fit in the room. It was still too tight! I did tell her that the room was booked inappropriately so that she did know. But the venue was dead set on her not knowing. My biggest problem was how much I had to fight day of the event. The banquet manager was mad that my client was booked on a blackout date ( not my fault, she had booked the event prior to me being involved). The banquet manager had all along been trying to make this wedding a disaster to prove herself right. That’s why there had been three coordinators quit over nine month period! I went and double checked all their orders before the event, and they had the wrong dessert order. Since the wedding was over a holiday, the bakery wasn’t even open. I finally understood why they seem to refuse to have a tasting for the desserts. Also this couple spent $75,000 on just this venue! If I had to guess this whole wedding cost $200,000. I don’t have all their bills but it’s definitely over $150,000.
Second story is from before I was independent. I had worked for a large venue in a major city that had five weddings a night. It was in 2006 when everybody was getting the same David’s bridal apple red dress and we had four brides in the same dress. This is usually not an issue we would concern ourselves with, but two of the brides were major brats. So we spent the evening trying to keep them apart from all the other brides. That’s the problem with being in the wedding business. Somebody will be mad because somebody else is wearing the same mass produced dress.
I went into the wedding business thinking it would be glamorous, and I know a lot of people think that. You’re really managing people and their emotions. It’s a lot of money to spend on something that’s not really tangent. The amount of pressure brides can get from peers and family is insane. Or it’s the opposite, the pressure they put on their peers and family it’s just unacceptable. It wasn’t this way before bridal TV shows started. Those shows made things exceptionally difficult for me over a three-year period. Completely changed the game, and no it is not ‘reality’ TV.”
“I’m Just About To Give Up”
“My best friend and his now ex-wife had gotten married in January after only being engaged for 3 months. He asked me to be the best man for the wedding! I said I was excited, and agreed. That’s when the wedding was planned for May, not January. I had a week-long training for work in Florida the same week as they when moved the wedding. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to move flights around, and had to pay a $200 change flight fee. But got things worked out. Yet in the midst of trying to figure out plane tickets and travel plans I had gotten bumped to ‘groomsmen’ which I was and am still chill with.
So the Friday before this Saturday wedding. I’m supposed to fly from Florida to Texas to Nashville to Chicago, and a friend was going to meet me and drive me to a small town about four and a half hours south of Chicago. All told, three flights and a long car ride, but I should be there by the morning of the wedding.
So the Friday afternoon of these travel plans come. I’m ready to leave, the tux has been picked up, and I’m on my way to my first flight from Florida to Texas. On the way to the airport, I get a message telling me the flight would be delayed. No big deal! I had and1.5 hour layover and just my carry on, so I’d be fine. About 20 minutes later, they message me again. This time to let me know the flight was going to be delayed for much longer.
I call my buddy and let him know. He tells me not to worry, he’ll see me when I get there. So I find a travel agent. They tell me the flight I’m on is still heading over to Nashville, but my connection to Chicago will have left and they’d be willing to rebook me. So I find the earliest flight I can from Nashville, but it isn’t until 6:30 am the next morning.
So I fly to Texas onto Nashville stay the night. The next morning, my flight is Chicago then St. Louis where my dad will meet me and whisk me to the church the tux would be waiting there and I’d be able to get dressed and go right into photos.
That night in Nashville I didn’t sleep at all. The next morning, I jumped on my flight for Chicago. Had a short layover things seemed to be going well. I was going to make it on time.
But then over the loudspeaker I hear, ‘Flight __ for St. Louis has be cancelled due to plane malfunction.’
At this point, I’m just about to give up when the ticket agent says another flight that’s about to leave is open. I grab my bag and rush to the gate get in line and luckily it seems I’ll be in the air on my way with a couple hours to spare. But we get stuck in taxi for over and hour.
When the plane finally takes off, we are getting off the ground right when we were meant to be touching down in STL. It’s a short flight, I think 45 minutes, but I’ve lost a ton of time.
I meet my dad in baggage claim and we race to the church. It’s a two and a half hour drive. We are leaving at 1:00pm for a 3:30pm wedding start time.
I make it to the church at 3:15pm I dress quickly meet my bridesmaid and walk down the aisle. Stay up until 1:30am.
I told the bride, ‘Sorry I almost didn’t make it.’
She asks, ‘What do you mean?’
The whole time I had been telling my friend what had been going, on he never told his wife. She never knew how close I was to not making it, and I think it was totally the right call.”
“Woman Still Looked Nuts”
“I was a bridesmaid in a wedding a few years ago. The bride and groom were both incredibly chill about everything. They had been dating for about eight years, and they were just so happy to finally be at a place in their life that they could do this. The rehearsal goes smoothly. They hired a random officiant and even though she has crazy old lady hair (teased in an awful beehive-ish creation) she seems like she knows her stuff.
The day-of goes smoothly…until 10 minutes before the ceremony. The groom sends in a passerby to the bride’s room to subtly find me. He said that no one has seen the officiant, and he wondered if I had a license by any chance (I was the only semi-religious bridesmaid and have a random enough personality that I might have randomly registered in the past.) I didn’t, but I thought two of our high school friends who happened to be groomsmen might. Neither of them were, but the usher just happened to be.
The groom and I are in full ‘get-it-done mode.’ He is helping the usher talk to venue staff so they can try to print a script off. I am telling the bride that people are still coming in and stalling the heck out of the day. I was instructed to talk to her when I got a text, and warn her that it was someone else who will be performing the ceremony.
Fifteen minutes after the scheduled start time, the hired officiant wanders into the dressing room and says, ‘Wow! I can’t believe you have everyone seated already! I’ve never had a wedding ready to start 15 minutes early!’
I am giving her a death glare. The bride is confused and says, ‘But… we are running 15 minutes late?’
The officiant gets a horrified look on her face, realizes that they thought the ceremony started at 6, not 5:30 (which she had said the correct time the night before) and owns up to it with the bride. I tell her that we were working on resolving the issue, but I was glad we could go with Plan A. Woman still looked nuts though.”