Imagine being THIS upset over a doughnut.
“My dad is the king of ‘I want to talk to your manager.’ He does the whole thing where he screams at cashiers for not accepting expired-last-year coupons, and will complain if his fast food he got for free with a coupon doesn’t come with enough potato wedges. That kind of thing.
The most embarrassing experience for me was one time when we went to Safeway, and he wanted to buy doughnuts for my brothers and me. Now, the Safeway bakery doesn’t exactly have top-tier baked goods, but they’re cheap, I guess. The doughnuts are 49 cents apiece. So he buys us all doughnuts, and then we eat them like 40 minutes later when we’re done with shopping and get home. I had selected a jelly doughnut, and when I ate it there was barely any jelly filling. I made the mistake of saying this out loud in front of my dad, but I wasn’t upset about it. I just kind of shrugged like ‘Oh well,’ and finished the doughnut.
My dad, however, was livid on my behalf. The next day he drives us way out of the way (probably spending multiple dollars in gas) to go back to the Safeway, because ‘no jelly filling in a doughnut is just unacceptable and we’re going to get you a new one.’
I begged him not to and said that I really didn’t want another doughnut and there was no need to go back to Safeway, but he was on a mission. We get to the Safeway, and he immediately gets a new jelly doughnut and marches up to a cashier like ‘I bought a doughnut for my daughter yesterday and it had no jelly filling. It was clearly defective, so I need to get a new one for free.’
Cashier was like, ‘Okay…are you returning the old doughnut?’
Dad: ‘No, she already ate it. That’s how we know there was no filling. And that’s just unacceptable. We need a replacement.’
I was standing as far away as possible, wishing I would melt into the ground, but he keeps gesturing at me, so I’m clearly part of this.
The cashier was like ‘Er…okay, I guess. Do you have the receipt?’
Of course my dad had the receipt. He keeps all of his receipts. He hands it over to her and then says ‘Actually, you should refund me for the original doughnut and also give me this one for free since I had to drive all the way back here to get a new one.’
Cashier says, ‘I can’t refund you and also give you a new one. It’s either/or.’
After arguing with the cashier for a minute or two, Dad asks to speak to the manager and throws a fit about the defective jelly doughnut. Manager apologizes profusely, and refunds my dad his 49 cents and gives us the new doughnut for free. My dad hands me my new doughnut triumphantly, and I’m like ready to cry from embarrassment and really annoyed at my dad.
As we walk out the door, I throw the new doughnut in the trash because, I didn’t want a new one in the first place, and I was so fed up and embarrassed at this point that I wouldn’t have been able to eat it even if I had wanted to.
My dad is angry that I ‘wasted’ it, and lectured me about being immature.”
